Do Parents Cause Eating Disorders
Only by passing on your genes, which were passed on to you by your parents. These would be genes associated with metabolism, and with some personality traits.
Genes do not, by themselves, make the illness happen, but they make it more likely if the environment interacts in such a way as to switch those gene functions on. An example of a high-risk environmental factor that is seen, so often, to trigger an eating disorder, is weight loss or being underweight. And the stressors around the Covid-19 pandemic have been associated by a rise in eating disorders by a factor of up to four.
Parents are precious resources in the treatment of eating disorders, and are welcomed by all the good therapists. See for instance this video by Adele Lafrance, of Emotion-Focused Family Therapy : ‘The Why of Parental and Caregiver Involvement in the Treatment of Mental Health Issues‘.
How Is Pica Treated
Doctors can help parents manage and stop pica-related behaviors. For example, they can work with parents on ways to prevent kids from getting the non-food things they eat. They may recommend childproof locks and high shelving to keep items out of reach.
Some kids with pica need help from a psychologist or other mental health professional. If these treatments do not work, doctors can also prescribe medicines.
Kids With A Serious Aversion To Many Foods May Need Help With Food Habits And Overcoming Avoidance
It is very common for kids to be slightly picky about what they eat. Finding a child who enjoys green vegetables is certainly harder than finding one who doesn’t. But some kids are more than picky eaters. Their aversion goes beyond normal choosiness and into an area where parents find they need to call for backup.
Picky eating begins to be a serious problem when kids are undernourished or eating so little that it severely limits their lives. “We typically start seeing kids who struggle with picky eating when they are 7 or 8 years old,” says Jerry Bubrick, PhD, a clinical psychologist at the Child Mind Institute. “That’s the age when parents begin realizing, ‘He used to be a great eater but now he won’t eat anything and it is affecting his quality of life,’ or, ‘We thought he’d grow out of it, but now we’re realizing it’s more than that.’”
Picky eating might reach a clinical level for a number of different reasons. Some kids have a heightened sense of smell that makes them taste flavors more intensely than most people. Others limit their diets because they have problems with . Whatever the reason, the longer a child is severely picky, the harder it will be for her to try new foods. Like any other bad habit, avoidance becomes ingrained in her—and her family’s—way of life.
Could The Eating Disorder Be Due To Brain Inflammation Like Pandas
There are some pathogens that cross the blood-brain barrier and produce really weird and distressing symptoms, some of which have a lot in common with with OCD combined with an eating disorder combined — anorexia in particular.
OCD seems to be a common factor in these brain inflammation conditions, and there may also be tics, bed wetting, hallucinations, alterations in movement or dexterity, extremes of mood, among others.
To help a physician make a diagnosis, be ready to present the family history of infections, as lab tests are not, on their own, conclusive.
Note that anorexia nervosa, in itself, is a brain disorder, bringing on lots of weird symptoms, so don’t jump to the conclusion that your child has brain inflammation, which is likely to be quite the exception. Watch this talk by Cynthia Kapphahn, to get a sense of how PANS may differ from ‘just’ anorexia nervosa .
If brain inflammation was a cause of your child’s eating disorder, it might also be a perpetuating factor. The good news is that there is medication. Not a magic bullet, though, as your child will most probably still need support to recover lost weight, and to let go of fears that have become installed.
To find out more, see or
Keywords for a search are:
- BGE: Inflammatory basal ganglia encephalitis
- PANS wich is a type of BGE
- PANDAS which is a type of PANS.
What Can I Say When I Discover My Child Has Been Binning Food In School
In Chapter 14 of my book I give you principles and examples of empathy and dialogue. Here is one more example you might relate to. The child has secretly been binning food in school and the parent is trying to connect, understand and find solutions. Read it .
If your child is binning food in school they probably need more support than you thought. More on school support .
The Importance Of Context: Case Study 2
A second case involves a 4-year-old girl, “Sophie.” As a child, Sophie learned to associate hunger signals and eating with threats , likely due to an undiagnosed cow’s milk allergy.9 She also had elevated emotionality, which increased her pain sensitivity.
Based on her history, doctors reasoned that her low and poor arousal recognition developed as a way to manage her stomach pain.
While Sophie participated in no neurological studies, her treatment provides insight into what brain regions might influence ARFID development, notably the insula. The insula regulates our internal experiences by telling us when we’re hungry, satiated, and in pain.
Doctors’ prescribed treatment for Sophie, the Feeling and Body Investigators ARFID Intervention, targets the insula. This intervention has children develop body sensation awareness through interactive experiences with cartoons, and it benefitted Sophie.
#4 Severe Fluctuations In Mood
Bipolar children are more likely to have rapid cycling, moving back and forth between a depressed mood and a manic mood over a shorter period of time or even within the same day. It’s common to see a pattern of severe fluctuations in mood, energy, and daily routines, which lead to difficulty in functioning in school, with friends, or at home, says Helena Verdeli, PhD, assistant professor of clinical psychology at Columbia University.
Is It True It’s All In The Genes
Partly. Genetics and environment affect each other. The genetic studies so far highlight the extent to which anorexia is a biopsychosocial illness: similar genetic markers are found in OCD, depression, schizophrenia and anxiety, in attainment of academic degrees, the drive to exercise or move, some metabolic traits, and the tendency to low body-fat. As I say more on my page on causation.
Interventions For Problem Behaviors In Autism
Health care professionals say that interventions that eliminate problem behaviors and re-teach feeding can help children with autism eat a healthy, balanced diet.3
Dr. Girolami said that while some children with autism may be selective with their diets due to compulsive behaviors, others may face motor and sensory challenges that restrict their ability to eat a variety of foods. A child with motor deficits may have trouble chewing and swallowing, which is why they may develop a preference for smooth foods that would not require much of either.
“Imagine if you had difficulty with the physical ability to put food into your mouth and move it around,” Dr. Girolami explained. “Food is no longer fun to eat when you put it in your mouth and all of a sudden, you’re gagging and you can’t swallow it. You would naturally gravitate towards foods that would be easy for you to eat.”
Some children may have a sensory intolerance to foods that make a loud noise, such as biting into a crunchy apple.3 In this case the child may acquire a preference for soft foods.
Silent Signs Of Eating Disorders In Children
Reader’s DigestSeptember 2017
At least 30 million people of all ages and genders suffer from an eating disorder in the U.S., according to the National Association of Anorexia Nervosa and Associated Disorders , and diagnosed cases of eating disorders in American children are on the rise. “This is partly due to better screening and more open conversation about mental health in general,” explains Heather Russo, Site Director at The Renfrew Center of Los Angeles, one of the country’s top treatment centers for eating disorders. “We also see some stigma vanishing as social media has allowed children to openly speak about their own eating and body struggles. The difficulty facing children now is the abundance of messages about food and appearance on every screen in front of them.”
For parents of children with eating disorders, help is out there. “Parents need allies in the fight against an eating disorder,” says Russo. “They need to work with a team of skilled professionals who can address the dietary, psychological and medical needs of their child.” However, children don’t often have the ability to express what they struggle with emotionally, so parents can watch out for the silent signs of an eating disorder.
Care For The Carer How Can Parents Survive
There are psychological and wisdom tools to help us when we are going through terrible hardships. I put them together in Chapter 15 of my book. And my Bitesize audio collection includes many short clips, mostly just a couple of minutes each, to give you practical and compassionate tips so you can cope better, manage your temper or tears, your thoughts and emotions, and even perhaps begin to thrive.
My Child Has An Eating Disorder
The most common question asked by parents of children struggling with eating disorders is:“Is the eating disorder my fault?”
In addition to a parent’s stress that their child is struggling with a complex and life threatening illness, many parents have intense guilt stemming from the belief that they contributed to the development of the eating disorder. As a result of this guilt, they can tend to shoulder the burden of “fixing” their child.
The answer to this question is a resounding “no.”
Families do not cause eating disorders, but they play a very important role in eating disorders treatment and recovery, regardless of the age of the patient.
Parents of children with eating disorders should turn to experienced eating disorder specialists to learn more about the genetic, psychological and sociocultural factors that converge in the development of eating disorders.Additionally, learning about eating disorder treatment and recovery, including strategies for being involved and supportive throughout this process, can help alleviate the guilt of having caused this illness and unshoulder the burden of needing to “fix” your child.
The Origins Of Eating Disorders In Children
According to research, one in five children diagnosed with an eating disorder have a history of early feeding problems, such as “fussy or picky” eating though this has not been identified as a direct cause of an Eating Disorder .
Almost half of those diagnosed with disorders by the age of 12 had a close family member with a mental health problem such as anxiety or a mood disorder.
The combination of biological factors, family history, and environmental issues, like peer pressure, or psychological stressors, including trauma, can also increase a child’s susceptibility to developing an eating disorder. Other factors that may increase risk for an eating disorder may include low-self esteem or behavioral issues.
My Child Is Socially Isolated Withdrawn In Their Bedroom
This is common at any stage of the treatment. When they’re very malnourished, do what you can to distract, allow plenty of rest, and refeed as fast as you can.
Sometimes the withdrawal is strongest when they’re weight-restored. If they’ve heard they’re supposed to now be well then they have an extra burden of shame and hopelessness. Try to gauge where they need time for grief and rest , when to make time for side-by-side activities that engender connecting conversations, and when they need you to give them some structure.
More in Chapters and of my book, and I also cover this in my Bitesize audios.
How To Do Exposure To Fear Foods
Sadly the only method that consistently works to get rid of a fear, is to do the fearful thing. The brain goes, ‘Oh, that wasn’t so bad’ and after some repetitions, it gets retrained, desensitised, ‘rewired’, so it doesn’t send our poor children down the fear route’.
Then there’s more help in Chapter 9 of my book: ‘How to free your child of fears: exposure therapy’.
How Is Arfid Treated
In an emergency situation, hospitalization may be required. While there, your child may need a feeding tube to receive adequate nutrition.
In most cases, this type of eating disorder is addressed before hospitalization is necessary. Nutritional counseling or regular meetings with a therapist can be very effective in helping your child to overcome their disorder. Your child may need to go on a specific diet and take prescribed nutritional supplements. This will help them catch up to a recommended weight while undergoing treatment.
Once vitamin and mineral deficiencies are addressed, your child may become more alert and regular feeding may become easier.
Which Of The Eating Disorders Is The Most Dangerous
All the eating disorders present immediate and long-term risks. It is easy to see the great danger an underweight person with anorexia is in, but people who binge or who purge are at high risk from malnutrition and electrolyte imbalance. All eating disorders also come with high risks from or self-harm. Whatever your child’s eating disorder, he or she need regular medical checks and specialised treatment.
My Child Is Scared Of Weight Gain Can I Keep Them Thin
The eating disorder will stay if your child is allowed to stay underweight — underweight meaning whatever your child needs for physical, mental and emotional stability. Their fear of weight will only pass by them going through the painful process of being exposed to that fear, and discovering it’s OK. More on Weight Restoration: Why and How Much Weight Gain?
My Child Is Weight Restored Is He Or She Now Safe
Well done for getting to this stage. If your child is not only weight-restored but eating without excessive anxiety, you’re through the first phase of treatment.
Treatment continues and very gradually starts to be less about feeding and more about helping your child practice normal behaviours over and over again: normal eating, normal exercising, normal reactions to stressful events. This rewires the brain, removes irrational fears, gives your child the confidence that they can live normally, and gives the body time to restore itself to full normal health.
It can take a year or more for normal hunger and fullness cues to return, so for a while people cannot eat completely independently – they need some degree of checking and correcting. Some physiological processes, some hormones, take a long time to get back to normal. Psychological changes take time and repetition too: your child will be scared of maintaining weight, of gaining weight, of eating various foods in various situations, of being among friends who are on diets.
Too often, treatment stops far too early, and then people talk of ‘relapse’. You will know better.
For a very brief overview of this stage, read ‘Steps to independence‘ which is part of my free helpsheets, downloadable .
If you prefer short audios, I cover this in detail in Bitesize. And sometimes I run an online workshop on the subject.
Benefits Of Physical Activity
Encourage your child or teen to be physically active. This offers many health benefits, including:
- Helps the body burn calories instead of storing them as body fat.
- Helps keep blood sugar levels more balanced and in a normal range .
- Lowers blood pressure and cholesterol levels.
- Helps make bones and muscles strong.
- Builds strength and endurance.
- Decreases stress and improves sleep and mental well-being.
- Improves self-esteem by helping children feel better about their bodies and appearance.
- Prevents serious health problems that can come with being overweight and obesity.
The American Academy of Family Physicians recognizes that regular physical activity is essential for healthy growth and development and encourages that all children and adolescents accumulate at least 60 minutes of moderate to vigorous aerobic physical activity every day. The AAFP also encourages parents and schools to make physical activity a priority. Prolonged periods of physical inactivity should also be discouraged both at home and at school.
There are ways you can help your child become physically active:
How Do I Do Self
I guide you step by step through self-compassion in one of my ‘Four guided meditations’. The shortest one is great to get you in a useful state of mind to support the next meal
What Do Parents Need To Do About Meals
If your child has anorexia , then the best treatment requires you, the parent, to find a way to get your child to eat. And to eat enough for weight recovery. And at some stage parents also help their child manage foods that have become fear foods. Usually that means that parents take charge of meals for as long as their son or daughter cannot safely and reliably take care of their nutrition.
My Bitesize audios and my have lots more on meals and how to get your child to eat. I also offer online group .
Could The Eating Disorder Be Due To Bad Gut Microbes
There’s tentative research on this, in particular for anorexia. As explained on ‘Could targeting gut microbes help treat anorexia nervosa?‘ it’s unclear if gut health is part of causation and/or part of the solution, for some people. If you are looking into the use of probiotics, prebiotics or synbiotics, note that these are unlikely to provide a total solution, so keep your focus on standard treatment as well.
What Are The Signs & Symptoms Of Binge Eating Disorder
Binge eaters usually are unhappy about their weight and many feel .
Someone who’s binge eating also might:
- eat a lot of food quickly
- hide food containers or wrappers in their room
- have big changes in their weight
- skip meals, eat at unusual times , and eat alone
- have a history of eating in response to emotional stress
People who binge might have feelings that are common in many eating disorders, such as depression, anxiety, guilt, or shame. They may avoid school, work, or socializing with friends because they’re ashamed of their binge eating problem or changes in their body shape and weight.
When kids or teen binge eat, parents may first suspect a problem when large amounts of food go missing from the pantry or refrigerator.
Binge eating is different from bulimia, another eating disorder. People with bulimia binge eat, but try to make up for overeating by throwing up, using laxatives, or to lose weight.
Can I Let My Child Choose Their Food
With old-style treatments, patients were involved in all the food choices. Meal plans would be negotiated with clinicians a week at a time. Sometimes calories were counted, food weighed. Parents were told to stay away while their child cooked and at in their bedroom.
This makes recovery very slow, or non-existent. Our children are too scared of food, and of weight gain, to make wise choices. Given too much choice, some eat less and less. Some eat just about enough to avoid hospital.
This is why a family-based approach normally works better: parents are mobilised to support their child to eat what’s needed. Most often that means parents take charge of meals. Some parents call it ‘Magic Plate’: the plate appears in front of their child as if by magic, containing what the child needs to eat. The young person is not involved in shopping, and stays out of the kitchen. Negotiations are kept to a minimum — though the parents may listen out carefully for hints .
At some stage, of course, parents will stop being in charge. But even then, there must be a phase during which they will continue to guide, to coach, to correct. Our children just can’t be expected to have the courage, or the perspective, to eat as much as they need, until they’ve had plenty of practice, until they have overcome all kinds of fears, and until their appetite and fullness cues are back on track.
This phase is often rushed or completely missed out , and I cover it in depth in Chapter 10 of my book.
Repetitive Or Restrictive Behaviors
An autistic child who has adopted certain repetitive or restrictive behaviors may exhibit some of these signs:
- performs repetitive motions, such as flapping their hands, rocking back and forth, or spinning
- persistently or repeatedly lines up toys or other objects in an organized fashion
- gets upset or frustrated by small changes in their daily routine
- has to follow certain routines
- plays with toys the same way every time
- likes certain parts of objects
- has obsessive interests
My Child Is Weight Restored But Stuck What To Do
It may be that your child isn’t getting the treatment phase that comes after weight-restoration. Or it may be they are not truly weight-restored — that their body needs more in order for the mind to have a chance to heal. More on Weight Restoration: Why and How Much Weight Gain? If your child was given a ‘one-size-fits-all’ target instead of an individualised target using their own growth chart and consideration of their symptoms, then there’s a high chance that their weight target was too low. More on: Is your child’s target weight a gift to the eating disorder?
The Truth About Sensory Processing Disorder
When Washington, D.C., mom Sara Durkin’s son was 3, she got a call one day from his preschool. “They said he wasn’t sitting in circle time, he wasn’t sharing as much as he should, and he liked to be the center of attention,” she recalls. There were other issues as well. He didn’t like group activities, although he did like to play one-on-one with other children. He was busy and physical, but he didn’t want to ride a bike and seemed a bit clumsy.
The school suggested that Durkin take her son to see an occupational therapist. “They said that he might have sensory processing disorder or something like that,” she recalls. Occupational therapy helps adults do better at their job and daily tasks. OT helps children be more comfortable and successful at play and in school.
Durkin and her husband thought he was just being a 3-year-old boy, and that in some ways — such as seeking the company of adults and enjoying the limelight — he was simply taking after his father, a national TV news correspondent. They elected to skip OT.
Then within a few months she heard from several other D.C. families. Their sons, all around the same age, had also been referred for occupational therapy with the suggestion that they might have sensory processing disorder or attention deficit hyperactivity disorder . “I have one neighbor who’s a speech pathologist and another who’s an audiologist, and they both told me is one of the most over-diagnosed disorders these days,” Durkin says.
How The Parents Are Involved With Treatment
It is extremely important once again that for children ages 8 to 12 years, that home environment changes and most psychosocial interventions are started with the parents. Parents should be a full partner in any treatment paradigm and they should be fully incorporated as part of the team.
There should be frequent family therapy throughout the duration of treatment and significant amount of time spent on psycho-education about eating disorders.
Parents often struggle with feelings of guilt, and this feeling should be eased by the therapeutic team. They have the duty to be as non-judgmental as possible in their approach to addressing family conflicts. It may be helpful for parents to become involved in a support group with other family members as a therapeutic form of guidance during the time of treatment.
Divorcing parents would benefit from counseling on how to co-parent appropriately as this decreases stress for the child. Parents should be strongly encouraged to address any of their own mental health problems. Building parenting skills may be useful for some parents that lack these skills.